What Is Your Deepest Purpose In Life?
April 17th 2015
I didn’t know it at the time, but one year ago today things were about to change dramatically for me. I was to begin a new chapter in my life. During this past year I experienced adversity in my career, lived most of the year with tons of uncertainty for my future, experienced the unbearable pain of losing a loved one, had financial struggles, legal issues and so on, but most importantly this year was a year of self-discovery and growth.
For the first time in my life I was forced to take a step back from the constantly busy lifestyle I had become so accustomed to, and take time to analyze my life and myself. I took time to separate myself from distractions and really dive into and attempt to discover who I was and who I wanted to become. I started asking myself the tough questions we often neglect. The results from this were pretty amazing and I want to share with you the most important realization I made during this year of discovery and growth.
Most people have no clue how to truthfully answer this question, “What is your greatest or deepest purpose in life?” It isn’t their faults either, as we do not live during an era or in a society that supports self-discovery. Rather it is the complete opposite.
It has never been easier than it is now to live your entire life without understanding or discovering what your deepest purpose is. Never before in history has there been more distractions and endless ways to waste time then there is today. With today’s technology and social media a lot of people spend countless hours doing meaningless activities that add no substance or value to their lives. It has become incredibly easy to merely exist, to go through day after day, without purpose.
Your “Deepest Purpose”
You are probably asking by now, “What is this crazy guy talking about? What does he even mean by our deepest purpose?” Let me explain.
Our deepest purpose is the reason for our existence. It is our own unique gift we can offer the world. Living a life driven by our deepest purpose is the only way we can die in bliss and truly feel we have lived a complete and fulfilled life. It is the only way we can feel we have shared and given all of ourselves back to the world.
Living a life driven by our deepest purpose
Understanding and discovering our deepest purpose is not an easy task, as it is a journey of self-discovery that requires brutal honesty with ones self. It is also ongoing, as life is change. Everything is ever changing from the world around us, to our relationships, our body, and even how we think. For example, we might think that we were foolish 10 years ago and are much wiser and have things figured out now, but 10 years from now we will believe our current thoughts to be immature.
This is why it is important to separate how we feel and think today, and our deepest purpose. Our emotions and minds are ever changing, as they are merely a display of conditioning of our past. Altered by information we are exposed to and our life experiences. As everything changes, our thoughts and emotions will change, but our deepest purpose is grounded in divinity and should be unwavering.
In order to help us discover our deepest purpose it is important to come to peace with the fact that life is an ever-changing cycle of living and dying. Because of this, change is predictable. Everything dies or eventually passes. All efforts dissolve. Everything we build will eventually fall apart. Whatever relationships you acquire you will eventually lose. Whatever you create in this world might be appreciated, it might be rejected, and over time it will certainly be forgotten.
This is a challenging concept for most people to come to peace with, as we often fear losing what we have acquired. A lot of people spend most of their life attempting to hold onto what they have and live in the fear of losing it. They might try to build something that will stand the test of time, elongate their lives, or procreate to ensure the family name lives on. These are people whom have not come to peace with the cycle of living and dying.
Living a life driven by your deepest purpose is to live a life of giving and letting go. We give our gift and ourselves to the world, and are able to let go because we accept that nothing besides God is eternal.
How to begin your journey of discovering your deepest purpose
Discovering your deepest purpose is going to be a little different for everyone, but I want to give you some advice on how to get started.
First off, in order to discover our deepest purpose we need to create formal periods of solitude in our life. This might be for 10 or 30 minutes a day, or even better a weekend, a couple weeks, or a month away. During this time of solitude we need to eliminate distractions, in order to allow ourselves to be present in the moment and feel everything around us.
At first this may be uncomfortable or even seem like a waste of time, but in time you will become more in tune with what your deepest purpose is. Amongst all the random thoughts and ideas that come to you there will be one thing your mind will always come back to or a commonality all your ideas have. You will be able to feel it and when you do you will be certain. However, don’t expect it to come to you the first time you put 10 minutes aside to relax and think, as this is a process.
Another helpful way to direct your thoughts during these times of solitude is to ask yourself these enlightening questions:
“If you knew you were to die in a month, what would you need to accomplish in the next month in order to die in bliss because you have used your life to give EVERYTHING you could to the world? What would you need to do or who would you need to become so you could die complete?”
As we change and evolve our answers to these questions might as well. How you currently feel you can best offer your deepest purpose to the world might be different than it was last year. This is okay and does not mean your deepest purpose is changing, but rather the ever-changing world is altering the methods in which you offer your deepest purpose. This is why it is so important to periodically come back to these questions, answer them truthfully, analyze your current situation in life, and then error correct your actions.
A lot of you may be thinking now, this all sounds great and all but it’s not for me because I have too many responsibilities and people who are dependent on me to spend time doing these things. However, living out our deepest purpose does not mean we neglect our jobs, families, and other responsibilities. It is far from it. You still need to pay the bills, feed your family, care for your loved ones, and any other responsibilities you may have.
Everyone needs to take care of the necessities in their lives, but it is on you to set up your life in a way that you can create those formal periods of solitude, in order to discover your deepest purpose. It is NOT selfish to set time aside for yourself for this purpose, but rather selfish not to because you will never be able to give all of yourself to your relationships or the world until you are living driven by your deepest purpose.
Why is this so important?
In order to live a life where you are not merely existing day by day and eventually dying, one must discover their deepest purpose. When we don’t live driven by our deepest purpose we begin to function from more superficial desires or our fears. Living life this way will never allow us to live a full life or ever feel satisfied and complete.
Most of us begin creating a life structured around our fears at a relatively young age. Some common examples are the fear of not having enough money, fear of being alone, or the fear of being judged by society.
Let’s look at the fear of not having enough money and how it drives our actions, as it is something almost everyone can relate to. When finishing up college or even deciding what degree to pursuit, we are constantly impacted by this fear of not having enough money. Our system is not structured towards self-discovery and guiding young people towards understanding themselves, but rather deciding a path early on, before they even know themselves, that will ensure financial “security”.
The fear of not having enough money will drive them to take the first job offered to them and begin working. They lose tract of what their deepest purpose is and are driven by these superficial desires. Living life this way is very doable and you can definitely be comfortable, but if you aren’t fulfilling your deepest purpose you will still feel incomplete regardless of the number in your bank account. I can guarantee that.
Other people build lasting relationships or rush into marriage because of their fear of being alone. Instead of asking themselves, “Does this person, this relationship, help me to better live a full life? Do they make me better or are they filling a void?” This is another reason why it is so important to discover your deepest purpose and understand who you are before you make a life long commitment to someone else.
It is not always easy living a fulfilling and complete life, where you have giving all of yourself to the world. At times it will definitely be easier to live driven by superficial desires and fears. However, if you aren’t even going to try to live a life true to yourself, where you are sharing your greatest gift to the world, where you are giving all of yourself back to the world, then your life lacks purpose. You will never feel complete or fulfilled.
In one of my favorite books, “Essentialism” the author interviewed people in a hospice. He noted that there was one recurring theme that always came up with every interview. The one thing that was that everyone’s biggest regret, was living the life they were expected to instead of being true to themselves. A poet Mary Oliver wrote,
“Years from now, what would you trade then to be back here now
for one chance, this chance, to be true to yourself.
On that day what will you hope you decided to do on this one?”
Do yourself and the world a favor; do not postpone one more day living a life driven by your deepest gift. Make time today to live how you need to live, to give what you need to give, so you can die today if today were your last day.
